I was driving down the interstate on a beautiful spring day about 10 years ago. It was the kind of spring day where you feel comfortable rolling the windows down, and the springtime angle of the sun just makes the world feel better.
I was in the left lane, traveling about 60 miles per hour, when I hit something in the road. My intuition screamed, “That was bad.” So I crossed the three lanes to the right and entered the breakdown lane. By the time the van came to a stop, my tire was completely flat.
I looked around, and three other cars had flat tires, too.
I pulled out my AAA card and called for roadside assistance. They were busy, and it would be over an hour before someone arrived.
So I struggled, replacing my tire with people whizzing by my ankles.
As I drove away, my mind started bouncing around like a teenage puppy off a leash:
- When am I going to have time to get a new tire?
- What if the rim is bent? I don’t want to pay for a new rim.
- Who put that on the road?
- What if I had crashed?
- What if the spare fails me before I reach my destination?
- What if the car shop tries to rip me off and charges me extra?
At the moment, all of those questions felt normal. To be honest, they felt necessary.
But they were not normal. They were not necessary.
They were ANXIETY playing its cruel tricks on my overactive mind.
A mentor once told me that when something terrible happens in our lives, we can respond in a couple of ways.
One response is to say, “Oh, crap!!!!!” (Or “Oh, s&*^!”) This is an anxiety-induced and anxiety-creating response. It takes a bad situation and spins it into several more sinister things.
The other is to respond simply, “Oh?” This acknowledges that something unexpected happened, but the question mark opens your mind to creative possibilities and solutions.
He then said, “The journey from “Oh, crap!!!!!!” to “Oh?” is a long one for people who struggle with anxiety.”
And I learned that several years ago, and the journey continues. But I am making progress.
Throughout this series, we will discuss *Leading in an Age of Anxiety*, and our first challenge is this: the next time something goes wrong, respond with “Oh?” instead of “Oh, crap!!!” This approach will help lower your anxiety and promote more creative thinking.
Oh, and none of the worst-case scenarios I imagined as I drove away ever came to fruition, and most of the time, they don’t.