You have been given a sacred trust as a leader. Let me explain in a gloomy but real way.
Compared to most people, I’ve attended a lot of funerals.
I grew up in a small town where my parents’ families had lived for generations. That environment gave me connections to a lot of people. I may not have known the deceased, but I knew someone close to them, and I (or my parents) went to support them.
I also spent 25 years working as a Pastor in a local church.
I learned something from a mentor about conducting funerals. The best thing you can do is get people to talk. So, I completely changed how I conducted funerals. I would ask a couple of people to give the official eulogy. Then, I would open the floor for people to share a quick story about the deceased.
The laughter and tears during this open-sharing bring healing.
After doing this for years, I noticed a trend: Attendees had little to say when people lived self-consumed lives. When individuals live lives of service, people won’t stop talking.
Recently, I came across two studies that troubled me:
- One Involved Deaths of Despair: “New findings published in the journal JAMA Psychiatry reflect a significant shift in deaths of despair among middle-aged adults. The study tracked rates of mortality from suicide, alcoholic liver disease and drug overdose from 1999 to 2022 among people 45 to 54 years old. Researchers found that in 2013, the rate of these deaths among whites was approximately double that of Blacks, at 72.15 per 100,000 population compared with 36.24 per 100,000.
But by 2022, the rate of deaths of despair among middle-aged Blacks had nearly tripled to 103.81 per 100,000, topping that of whites at 102.63 per 100,000. The study points to increasing drug overdose deaths among Black individuals as fueling the surge, and also shows American Indian or Alaska Native people had a higher rate of deaths of despair than other racial or ethnic groups across all years covered by the study.”
- The Mental Health of College Students: Several factors contribute to the increased mental health challenges faced by college students. The survey revealed that a lack of meaning or purpose was the most commonly cited challenge, affecting nearly 58% of young adults in the survey. Other significant stressors included uncertainties about the career path (50%), financial concerns (56%), pressure to achieve (51%), a sense of falling apart (45%), and lack of meaningful relationships (44%).
The alarming rise of deaths of despair in blacks and American Indian or Alaska Native people is horrifying. It is also disturbing to note that among whites, deaths of despair are still rising at a significant rate.
And college students not having a sense of meaning or purpose is disconcerting.
I write this not to depress or scare you.
I write this to remind you that you have been given a sacred trust if you are a leader.
You can inject people’s stories with hope and meaning by giving them good work to do—work that goes beyond a paycheck or a product, gives people a reason to wake up in the morning, and excites them to work on something significant.
You are the one who can help people live better stories–stories that will make better eulogies and less awkward funerals.
Focusing on meaning could delay that funeral for a few decades and give college students hope.
So embrace this sacred trust and lead well. People crave the purpose you provide.
